be open to friendship

I've sometimes felt a scarcity mindset with respect to friendship. Like: friends and especially close friends and relationships are things that take time, and time is scarce, so therefore friendships are scarce. And it's pointless or even dangerous to try to build friendships with new people unless they seem really awesome, because that means committing time to them that I might not enjoy, and that would take away from other more important things.

At other times (like right after a breakup) I feel much more of a growth mindset. I recognize that friends are important, that I don't have many, and I'm excited at the idea that I can do more to make friends with people. But I wonder if that abundance mindset is durable or if it's the result of temporary scarcity. If I make a few friends, that start taking up time, will I go back to a scarcity mindset?

A few reasons why hopefully this won't be the case:

• First, being open to new friendships doesn't mean they'll always happen or blossom into something big. Just being nice to someone, even inviting them out to a meal or activity or whatever, does not mean I'll suddenly be committed to do everything with them forever. Or even that they'll try to take up more of my time. Friendships are living things that both sides experience. If we enjoy hanging out with each other, we'll both tend to do it more. If not, then the other person probably won't follow up and neither will I and it's fine. The only bad case is with someone whose standards for enjoyment are really different from mine, or who has a big (unreciprocated) crush on me or something, such that they really want time even when I'm not enjoying it. But that's a bridge to cross when I come to it. The price of being irrationally scared of that situation - scared that I might end up in an awkward situation or have to be an asshole to someone - would be that I'd be an asshole to everyone in the sense of not being open to friendship.
• Second, realizing that time does not equal quality. Friendship is a skill and one that I should be better at. I've spent a lot of grad school time socializing which might not have developed into my having any good friendships. Being more open to friendships allows me to get better at it and do more with less. This is related to the argument about economic growth: on the one hand, resources are finite so you'd think it can't go on forever, but on the other hand, technology (and insight into art, etc., things that provide utility that can in theory be measured) can always improve. So in this sense an abundance mindset is always appropriate for friendship: sure, time is limited, but I can always get better at it. And I should strive to.